i think missy's trying to kill a bug.

or a mouse, which we haven't had around lately. but she's definitely going hard at something underneath the couch. it's minutely offputting, to say the last. i am, again, eating bagel bites like it's my job. and i made a playlist (by made, i mean i set music on random and let it happen for twenty songs) and i'm happy with the list it came up with. here goes:

1) crystalised by the xx

2) i heard it through the grapevine by marvin gaye

3) none shall pass by aesop rock

4) be my escape (acoustic) by relient k

5) lupe the gorilla by lupe fiasco

6) make sure u getta shirt!!! by lupe fiasco

7) movies of myself by rufus wainwright

8) lean on me by bill withers

9) you wouldn't like me by tegan and sara

10) apologize (remix) by onerepublic (basically that means it's the version with timbaland)

11) natasha by rufus wainwright

12) blue skies by jaymay

13) won't stop by onerepublic

14) the show goes on by lupe fiasco

15) girls and boys in school by neon trees

16) fidelity by regina spektor

17) who i am hates who i've been (acoustic) by relient k

18) gray or blue by jaymay

19) allah, allah, allah by mewithoutyou

20) sprawl ii (mountains beyond mountains) by arcade fire

pretty nifty, huh? i like it. strudel: if you want a burned copy, let me know. i can make it for you. i think i have a few random cds laying around. also, whenever we hang out next, i'd love to pilfer those lovely iron and wine cds. (:

so today. i felt guilty the first half of the day for sleeping in like i did. i felt worse after i sat there, lazing about, watching burn notice: the fall of sam axe (which i'll report on after this tangent) and not doing anything i was supposed to. again. i'm having a terrible time finding the inspiration that i need. those quotes below? did nothing. i need something. maybe a song. maybe i'll go withmood rings by relient k. humhum. that would be ideal. humhum indeed.

so after being lazy, i showered. got ready for work. and jetted off! thanks to ms. strudel, i now have a phone-adapter for my music for my car, so i jammed out to some random music. and i attribute the massive amount of music i have on my phone to my little brother, as he did put quite a bit. and i have yet more to add once i get around to it... i guess i could do that now. hum. i want to add:

imogen heap, tfk, 38th parallel, chase, some of the random songs i discovered i now have, maybe the swingle singers, tori amos, coldplay, bad company, led zeppelin, elp, fleet foxes, flobots, peter gabriel (mmm).

that's just a few. maybe i'll do that now... i'm just so lazy.

so anyway. went to work, spent some short quality time with joanna, tom and janet before they all split. went in a half hour early because alyssa called out. (hey, i need the money...) and then let's see. went on break and chatted with james. (it's funny: no one ever really realizes that he's only got four fingers on his right hand...) then went into the break room and chatted with the lovely ms. rebecca, who i have way too much in common with. her obsession with jim dale rivals mine with patrick stewart. then i went back to work, lazed about (literally... tomi and i were lazy sumbitches tonight). spoke with eva! who i adore. and her boyfriend/husband, whose name i don't remember... but i love them both. they're both entirely too sweet for their own good. i need to email her. i have her number and email and i wanted to send her some of my poetry (she's probably already sent me some of hers. i need to scrounge some up. nothing too good milling about these days. ever since i got rid of facebook, i've lost a few good ones. but there is that one i have on my other blog...)

so i went on my fifteen. then it occurred to me! i'd forgotten entirely about ryan. i'd promised him i'd spend my fifteen with him! and it simply didn't happen. i got back from my fifteen and apologized profusely. he was endearingly mad at me. made fun of me a bit, though. and rightly so. because i'm quite the nutball. so he very generously visited me on both of his breaks. i made me a pretty sweet drink, though, to make up for it. i made him a white mocha, raspberry, hazelnut, caramel steamer with whipped cream and chocolate and caramel drizzle. he enjoyed it. and i tasted a bit of it and liked it myself. i'm pretty nifty when i want to be.

so he visited for both breaks of his. we chatted. he refused to give me more clues. and then! and then. he threw me under the bus when clare started to badger him. she shrieked "what's this about a hipster?!" and all i could do was laugh and poke him for being mean. she dissipated (just materialized somewhere else, i'm assuming, as i turned and she was gone with her frappuccino drenched in half-cup-full whipped cream). so he and i continued. he shared my crunchy peanut butter cookie, told me less distinctive things about this girl he's seeing (she has all her limbs, hair on her head - many strands, wears clothes, and is definitely female; helpful, really) and shared in my struggle with things all entirely opposite sex related.

so he disappeared, tomi and i kicked it into high gear, probably will get in trouble for what we did too soon but who cares, ali was a doll and put up the chairs for us and helped the booksellers put away the magazines. we swept up, mopped, did our nonsense. john praised us for being helpful in bargain (which is always a warzone at the end of the night) and then we all left. tomi and i had our hand-holding shenanigans. and told me about her, wil and possibly danielle (though there are complications - i'll be nice to not mention them haha) and their slightly possible predicament? well, not predicament, i guess. more like desire. but not desire?

ah, potential threesomes are so intricate.

so here i am. eating bagel bites. like it's my job. half watching eagle eye (which has michelle monaghan, who i adore, and whatshisface. shia labeof or whatever his last name is. i'm too not-caring-about-him-enough to look up his last name). listening to this ludicrous mix. which is lovely, really. and you wouldn't like me by tegan and sara always reminds me of sherlock (the bbc series... which is delicious.) and now i really want to watch it. i if i make any headway tonight on this story, maybe i will.

brief interlude! as i go to check my email!

sent her like, ten poems. give or take. most of them are up on brain-souffle.blogspot.com

anyway.

so, the burn notice: fall of sam axe was pretty entertaining. there was a slight cameo of michael weston, and mention of fi. for a moment. i love lupe fiasco, just saying. back to the movie. it was short, and nicely paced. but it was true sam style. i think it could've been a bit better, but entirely hilarious. he keeps asking for a bear. which is sam to a tee. and he does a lot to help these people, which is another element of sam that's true; throughout the series he has an unnatural caring ability that you wouldn't think you'd find an ex-navy seal. who, also, loves to drink. maybe he's just drunk all the time. either way, he's a fun one, and though it was definitely a made-for-tv movie, i liked it.

i think i'm going to scare the pants off myself and just watch session 9 by myself. but i need to put some work into this story first! i really do! i need to come up with something, otherwise it's going to blow me over. and not in a good way. it needs to get done by saturday and i haven't evenstarted yet. i think i need to get some kind of inspiration. i need an idea of how i want to start it, really. something that can grow from it.

i've started up the story that i've wanted to finish for two and a half years. the one that starts with i'm six feet under and i've started to rot. because i love the way that sounds. egotistical much?

i'm kind of still hungry (but i think that's a lie.)

all in all, today was a good day.i'm a little exhausted and not looking forward to work tomorrow, but meh. i'm working with louisa, so i'm not worried by any means. and it should be fun. maybe what i'll do is try to actually get some stuff done during the day. like i was supposed to. i think tomorrow is supposed to be dedicated to fixing that stupid play i've started on. horrible. really really horrible. utter drivel. needs total reworking. i haven't decided yet what i want to do to it, but i'll get there... eventually.

hopefully. i wish i'd gotten more feedback other than brogger's. i got a few suggestions, mostly the tea/coffee thing that got confusing. but ugh. who the eff cares about that! i need to figure out what the problems are. i spend too much time thinking about arnold's back story and not enough on sophia's. at all. ugh. stupid.

my brain is not going to function at this level. i think i'll put craig ferguson on low in the background, listen to mood rings and blue skies and maybe another two songs on loop and hope they inspire me somehow. growl! gratch lug richarg.

sorry.

for future reference, to anyone who will ever understand this: i call zeddicus z'ul zorander. all the time, every time. get used to it.

love you all. (:

-aleey

ps. SMILEGODDAMNITORIKILLYAHFACE.