the hardest part of going to a funeral is seeing people grieve, especially when it's a funeral for a family member you weren't particularly close to. all i kept thinking about was how i hadn't gotten the chance to go to my uncle larry's funeral and my uncle jimmy's funeral. which i guess is good, i probably would've been an enormous mess, but it still made me regret it. in all fairness, i didn't even know my uncle jimmy had passed away until a few months after, because his wife couldn't find our number.
all i wanted all day was a really big hug, but i didn't want to impose it on anyone. i could still kind of use one. perhaps when i see alex i will get him to give me one, because... i don't know, he owes me? i just really want that hug.
that's all i wanted, all day. that and to hear from... someone. but that wasn't going to happen. so a hug would've been nice. but again, i didn't want to force myself on anyone. especially if i knew i was going to cry. a lot.
goodnight.
-aleey
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